vodka 2 oz vodka
2 oz Southern Comfort® peach liqueur
2 oz Bacardi® Razz rum
2 oz Captain Morgan® Original spiced rum
4 oz orange juice
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A ragged individual stranded for several months
on a small desert island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean one day
noticed a bottle lying in the sand with a piece of paper in it.
Rushing to
the bottle, he pulled out the cork and with shaking hands
withdrew the
message.
"Due to lack of maintenance," he read,
"we regretfully have found it
necessary to cancel your e-mail
account."
Ever wonder why they never show the film ALIVE
in-flight?...... It's not
because of the film's content,
it's because the people in the film
are
eating better than the
people on board.
A plane was taking off from Kennedy. After it
reached a
comfortable
cruising altitude, the captain made an
announcement over the
intercom, "Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your
captain speaking.
Welcome to
Flight number 293, non-stop from New
York to Los Angeles. The weather
ahead is good and therefore we
should have a smooth flight, Now sit
back
and relax. - OH MY
GOD!"
Silence
Then, the captain came back on the intercom and
said: "Ladies and
Gentlemen, I an so sorry if I scared you earlier,
but while I was
talking
the flight attendant brought me a cup
of coffee and spilled the hot
coffee
in my lap. You should see
the front of my pants!"
A passenger in Coach said: "That's
nothing. He should see the back of
mine!"
"Careful with fire" is good advice we know.
"Careful with words" is ten times doubly so. William Carleton
[T]here's no bad day that can't be overcome by listening to a barbershop quartet; this is just truth, plain and simple. Chuck Sigars
A celibate clergy is an especially good idea, because it tends to suppress any hereditary propensity toward fanaticism. Carl Sagan