Cocktails 1 1/2 oz tequila
4 oz cranberry juice
1 oz grapefruit juice
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A ragged individual stranded for several months
on a small desert island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean one day
noticed a bottle lying in the sand with a piece of paper in it.
Rushing to
the bottle, he pulled out the cork and with shaking hands
withdrew the
message.
"Due to lack of maintenance," he read,
"we regretfully have found it
necessary to cancel your e-mail
account."
What is the difference between an aardvark and
a coyote?
One has a long smeller, the other, a loud yeller!
Two accountants are in a bank, when armed
robbers burst in. While several of the robbers take the money from the
tellers, others line the customers, including the accountants, up
against
a wall, and proceed to take their wallets, watches, etc.
While this is
going on accountant number one jams something in
accountant number
two's hand. Without looking down, accountant number two
whispers, "What
is this?" to which accountant number one replies,
"it's that $50 I
owe you."
A bird in the hand's worth two fleeing by. Scottish Proverb
A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who, however, has never learned to walk forward. Franklin D. Roosevelt
A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. Benjamin Franklin