Shots & Shooters 1 oz sake rice wine
1 oz cranberry juice
1 splash grenadine syrup
Start
people
pronouns
other
hello
school
Subcategories::
A little guy gets on a plane and sits next to
the window.
A few minutes later, a big, heavy, strong
mean-looking, hulking guy
plops
down in the seat next to him and
immediately falls asleep.
The little guy starts to feel a little airsick,
but he's afraid to
wake
the big guy up to ask if he can go to the
bathroom. He knows he can't
climb over him, and so the little guy
is sitting there, looking at the
big
guy, trying to decide what
to do.
Suddenly, the plane hits an air pocket and an uncontrollable
wave of
nausea passes through the little guy. He can't hold it in
any longer
and
he pukes all over the big guy's
chest.
About five minutes later the big guy wakes up, looks down, and sees
the
vomit all over him.
"So," says the little guy, "are you
feeling better now?"
A guy stumbles
through the
front door of a bar, ambles up to the bartender and orders a
beer.
The bartender looks at the drunk man and says,"I'm sorry sir, but
I
can't serve you...you've already had too much to drink." The
guy
swears and walks out of the bar.
Five minutes later the
guy comes flying through the side door of the
bar, and yells for a
beer.
Again the bartender says,"I'm sorry, sir...but I can't
serve
you...you've already had too much to drink!"
Ten
minutes later, the same guy comes barrel-assing through the back
door
of the bar, storms up to the bartender, and demands a beer.
Again, the bartender says to the man..."I'm really sorry, sir, but
you've had too much to drink...you're going to have to leave!"
The guy looks quizzically at the bartender and says finally, "My God,
man... How many bars do you work at?!!!"
A man asked his wife, "What would you most
like for your birthday?"
She said, "I'd love to be ten
again."
On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early
and they
went to a theme park. He put her on every ride in the park
- the Death
Slide, The Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear. She had a
go on every ride
there was.
She staggered out of the theme
park five hours later, her head reeling
and her stomach
turning.
Then off to a movie theater, popcorn, cola and sweets.
At
last she staggered home with her husband and collapsed into
bed.
Her husband leaned over and asked, "Well, dear, what was it like being
ten again?"
One eye opened and she groaned, "Actually, honey,
I meant dress
size!"
Be silent as to services you have rendered, but speak of favours you have received. Seneca
Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about seeking whom he may devour. Bible
Delay not; swift the flight of fortune's greatest favours. Seneca