Cocktails 3 oz vodka
3 oz Blue Curacao liqueur
1 1/2 oz club soda
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What is uglier than an aardvark?
Two
aardvarks!
An accountant visited the Natural History
museum. While standing near the dinosaur he said to his neighbor:
"This
dinosaur is two billion years and ten months old".
"Where did
you get this exact information?"
"I was here ten months ago, and
the guide told me that the dinosaur is
two billion years old."
Two accountants are in a bank, when armed
robbers burst in. While several of the robbers take the money from the
tellers, others line the customers, including the accountants, up
against
a wall, and proceed to take their wallets, watches, etc.
While this is
going on accountant number one jams something in
accountant number
two's hand. Without looking down, accountant number two
whispers, "What
is this?" to which accountant number one replies,
"it's that $50 I
owe you."
Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs. P. J. O Rourke
I cannot forgive my friends for dying; I do not find these vanishing acts of theirs at all amusing. Logan Pearsall Smith
Let us have a care not to disclose our hearts to those who shut up theirs against us. Francis Beaumont